In life and especially in the workplace, one thing is constant…change is going to happen! Some people anticipate and welcome change while many others find it both emotionally and mentally challenging. So why is it difficult for so many people?
The process of change in our lives and career can lead us toward growth and fulfillment if we learn how to cooperate with this unyielding force. When we can understand the natural process of change and partner with this force of evolution we can take a quantum leap in our overall happiness both personally and of course professionally.
Some things to consider when understanding change:
- When change occurs, a part of us naturally recoils and resists as our brains are hardwired to crave certainty and doesn’t enjoy chartering the unknown.
- If the recoiling is stronger than our reach to embrace the change, we can experience procrastination and potential denial.
- If we resist change too often we experience struggle, frustration and stagnation which can become a temporary or potentially permanent mindset.
The 1st Secret:
Seek growth rather than change.
Growth is the process of reaching for something new (expanding your consciousness) while letting go of the old. Growth can always leads to positive change in our lives. Whether it is a new relationship, a new belief or a new experience, growth ultimately leads to positive change as it shifts from the old to embrace the new. The challenge for many is wanting to understand both the why and the when. Remembering this should help you:
- Growth always produces change; but change does not necessarily produce growth.
- Growth is about evolving to become more of who you are meant to be.
- Ask yourself, How are the changes that are occurring going to impact your life? Look at the changes and determine where the growth opportunities lie and choose to take action to gain both clarity, empowerment and development around those opportunities.
The 2nd Secret:
Genuine change involves emotion.
Some people seek only physical changes. They want to change the physical aspects of their lives without changing their feelings. For example, changing their haircut, living situation, fashion sense, partner etc.) assuming that this change in physical form will bring about a change in their feelings. Personal growth can be limited and change is not permanent. However, when change is made at an emotional level, growth is produced and the physical form begins to change without struggle. The foundation for permanent change begins within our emotional nature. Our emotions prompt us to take action and set things in motion. Remembering this should help you:
- Emotions provide your motivation and they must be a part of change before genuine change can occur. When you begin inside out, change flows more naturally and with less resistance.
The 3rd Secret:
All Change Produces uncertainty.
Uncertainty and change always function together. It isn’t change that you resist; it’s your brains attempt to avoid the unknown that creates resistance. When change happens it is always accompanied by uncertainty. Uncertainty can be either surfaced or deep but either way it’s a natural foundation to the process of every change. Change is messy and the ego is challenged to accept it because it looks less than perfect. Remembering this should help you:
- There is natural opposition between our head and heart that creates resistance to change. Life is not to be controlled (especially by our ego) – but rather embraced and experienced. We can influence the direction of change when we let go of control, embrace the uncertainty and learn to be with the unknown and change.
- Uncertainty is neutral and is a part of every change. This truth can help you relax and stop worrying that you might be doing something wrong when you feel the uncertainty of change. It’s natural to feel uncertain when you experience change in your life.
- Changes on any level produce some level of uncertainty. So let uncertainty be a part of your life, stop judging it as bad and learn to embrace it. This will help you to move beyond your resistance very quickly.
The 4th Secret:
Focus on creating a positive outcome by visualizing your future self.
How often do you think about what you don’t want to happen versus what you do want? This only attracts more of what you don’t want. To make changes while in the throes of uncertainty, focus on the future of how you’d like the changes to occur in your life. Remembering this should help you:
- Learn to focus your mind with practicing mindfulness and meditation. In a state of meditation, you can visualize your future self. Find a relaxed position, close your eyes and take in several deep breaths to help relax your body and focus your mind. Begin to imagine yourself in the future with the changes you desire in your life. Think about how you will feel once you’ve created the positive changes in your life. Your subconscious mind can begin to help you create the changes you desire. Repeat this on a regular basis at least once a week.
There is no magic pill for how one deals with change on any level – nor is there one simple solution to transforming your relationship to change and the emotions the accompany it. Experiencing change (like life) is all about your “relationship” to it and not the actual event that is happening at that time.
I would also caution anyone when listening to others whom may have experienced something similar to what you may be going through. Although their insight and support may be of value, remember that every situation and set of circumstances are different and as a result, so is/was their experience. In the end, it comes does to shifting your mindset and empowering yourself around the opportunities you can create which will ultimately put you back in the driver seat of your life while adding some ease and comfort.
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