You’re ready to address your list of to-dos when unexpectedly your attention is needed elsewhere, or you’re stymied by a problem where you have no solution. Building on feeling frustrated, the internal feeling turns into resentment, anxiety, overwhelm, and ultimately defeat.
Imagine a world without conflict. We could have the solutions to all of our concerns. We could add an extra day to the week or hours to our day. Our relationships would be seamless, and our energies would never exhaust. While this utopia isn’t possible, there is one action that will get you close. Asking for HELP.
Four common reasons we don’t ask for help:
- We may feel we will be revealing incompetency (what we tell ourselves, not a truth)
- We may feel judged (what we tell ourselves, not a truth)
- If we truly get the help we needed, we may need to make a change (always a show stopper)
- We think we shouldn’t have to ask, (no one reads minds!)
Successful people privately or professionally understand that asking for help can not only lessen their to-do list but also opens up the possibility of learning something new.
People want to help (even if they are not asking for help). Researchers, scientists, and leaders all agree helping others elevates our need to be purposeful. It is a natural instinct that studies show is present at birth. Asking for help can feel uncomfortable, but it’s a sure-fire way to lessen your workload, get unanswered questions resolved, provide a sense of relief, and propel self-confidence.
Overall if asking for help is uncomfortable, consider the following:
- No one will think less of you if you are direct and comfortable in your request.
- Take the guesswork out of it for the other person. Let the person know what you need, set them up to succeed by being direct, and detailed. giving details, trusting them, and appreciating the gesture.
- Don’t apologize for asking for help Let the person know what you need, set them up to succeed, trust them, and appreciate their gesture.
IN THE END: Admitting you need help, and asking for it, is a triumph that sparks curiosity, creativity, and open-mindedness. It shows a desire to learn and achieve, building resilience, increasing productivity, and emotional stability.
Make asking for HELP your new comfort zone.
The Floor Is Yours: What stops you from asking for help?
Joshua Miller is a Master Certified Executive Coach, creative leader and bestselling author. His career spans both the advertising world and the world of leadership. In advertising, he was the creative lead, responsible for the campaign strategy for Fortune 100 brands. Today, he is an innovator. He’s supporting the executive development and change management for many of the same companies.
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